Healthly friendship prior to dating
Instead of making a grand entrance after years of radio silence, engage in small gestures with low stakes. Kirmayer suggests reaching out and offering congratulations on a milestone or accomplishment, or asking for a recommendation you know they’ll be happy to provide (“I heard you recently went to Paris. Also, if you haven’t seen this person in a long time, invite them to a group dinner or small party.
Keep sensitive topics close to your chest at first.“That is, without having to directly address why your friendship ended.” This approach will help start your renewed friendship off on the right foot.Just as most people wouldn’t propose marriage on a first date or ask about vacation benefits in the first 10 minutes of a job interview, jumping the gun can backfire. “These kinds of small interactions or conversations will help you gauge their receptiveness and set the stage for more personal or meaningful conversations,” she said.So when those friendships fade, particularly the ones built over years or decades, a rare bond is lost.Indeed, moving from acquaintance to casual friend typically takes around 50 hours of shared activities and everyday talk, and it can take more than 200 hours before someone becomes a best friend, according to a report in the Journal of Social and Personal Relationships.
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It is important for youth to be able to recognize signs of unhealthy relationships before they escalate.