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Me and my ex-boyfriend dated for three years then he broke up with me and he started to date some other broke up now and I still miss haven't talked in about almost a year and I don't know how to start a conversation up with him or anything cause I don't want to look weird or desperate or anything how do I go about talking to him again?

A friend once told me his test of whether he's over an ex is whether it would bother him if they were dating someone else.

The person they're dating now is not necessarily smarter, more attractive, or kinder than you. Comparing yourself to your ex's new partner, whether to wonder if they're better than you or to wonder if they're similar to you, will lead you down the wrong line of reasoning.

The fact that you broke up wasn't a failure on your part; things just didn't work out, and they might not work out with this new person either. People don't choose people based on checklists; each person will appeal to someone for a different reason. Your ex's new significant other is not your replacement.

He professed his love but said he was very confused. Contained observations and opinions should not be misconstrued as specific counseling advice.

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Your ex just happened to stumble upon someone else before you did. When my ex first got a new girlfriend, I feared that it endangered the friendship we formed post-breakup.

But even if it changed the dynamics of our relationship a bit, it didn't change how he felt.

Your ex will never experience with this new person exactly what they did with you.

He gave me the reason he didn’t think it was right to do it while he was still with her. The Site is intended only for use by consumers in search of general information of interest pertaining to problems people may face as individuals and in relationships and related topics.

I finally gave him an ultimatum and told him I couldn’t play second fiddle. Content is not intended to replace or serve as substitute for professional consultation or service.

If you can confide in your ex about your current relationship, perhaps that's the ultimate sign you've moved on — to a friendship that's just as special.

Three months later we realized we have feelings for each other. You have not even met this person who may or may not be a man and who may or may not have a girlfriend. C.) He told you from the beginning he’s only looking to be friends.

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He’s living with her and they’ve been together for four years. But even if you don’t do that, let’s assume for a moment he’s actually who he says he is and ignore the fact he began writing to you by lying about his relationship status. The question should not be about giving him an ultimatum, but rather, should you give yourself the love you deserve?

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